He's driving.

Words cant even describe how Im feeling right now. Just two weeks ago, I was sooo broken I couldnt see or hear anything but the clouds, raging wind, fierce thunder, and pouring rain. Now...bc I continued to choose to praise GOD in this storm...Im finally seeing! The JOY of the LORD has been my strength and its been a strength that I couldnt possibly explain to anyone! One I didnt even know existed before! And now, Im finally seeing tidbits of light shining through the clouds. Today was THE BEST. I have not had that much fun in ages. (Or even know that much fun could be had!:) And I remember posting a similar blog just last week....God, THANK YOU!!!!!!!! ((For, in this time I can say I have THE best family and friends ever! And their love for me has been shown so much and in soo many different ways!!!!))This life may be now/always be crazy, scary, or painful but God, You are always God. No matter what! And this truth...Wow. I wouldnt trade this broken time in my life for anything now, bc it has lead me to a deeper relationship with and understanding (on levels I didnt know existed) of MY SAVIOR!!!!!!! Just three months ago on that night, how could I not see it then? That YOU knew what You were doing. That YOU knew the plan. That YOU knew my heart. That YOU have held me and never will ever EVER let go. And that YOU know the outcome!!!!!! How then could I have been so down in these recent months?? I still have questions. And I know now that its ok to question sometimes. Some things we will never understand on this side of heaven. You leave things unanswered for Your reasons. And You allow things to happen for Your reasons. Not all of it is from You, but You allow it. Bc in the end, all is done so IT WILL ALL WORK OUT FOR THE GOOD OF THOSE WHO LOVE YOU, JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God, thank you for leading me to this day. Laying it on my heart late late one night. Then for orchestrating it in the way You chose. Im learning that You love taking me on these unexpected turns! Bc it has been a true test of faith. And Im so glad You work in the ways You do! Who the heck am I to say what I need?? YOU created me!!! This RIDE has been very eventful. And Im starting to love it more and more. And Im soooo grateful that YOU are in the driver's seat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♥